It all began with a whisper of a promise: "This is our love story."
It was the last week of June in 2008, and I was on my knocking knees in desperate fear. I was all alone, in a country not my own, surrounded by a language I did not understand and did not believe I would ever master. And yet God, in His loving-kindness, chose that very moment to soothe me with His love and remind me of the great plans He had for my time in Honduras; a length of stay unbeknownst to me at that time.
Well, we all know that God writes incredible love stories...stories of adventure, hope, heroic battle, victory, and romance. And yet, as characters in His great novels, we also know that He disciplines those He loves. And so has been my partnership with the Lord in this great "love story" of the past 4 years and 8 months. I've been beyond blessed to accomplish and experience amazing feats I never thought of or dreamed to be possible (i.e. learning Spanish, returning to grad. school, and returning to running competition). I've seen the beauty of His Creation in little corners of this ginormous world I never imagined I'd visit, from remote towns in Honduras to the breath-taking Mayan ruins of Tikal, Guatemala. I've learned and continue to take hold of the religion that is considered pure and faultless: truly loving orphans and widows in their distress. I've also learned that true love is more of a commitment than anything else. I've knocked things off the "bucket list" before I even knew they were there. I now always lose at the "I've never..." game with my students, because there's just not much I haven't done yet...WOW...and it is all by God's unbelievable grace. I serve a great, great God and stand in awe of how unworthy I am of the many gifts and blessings He loves to shower down on His children.
Yet these riches haven't come without great cost. While I now more intimately understand His love and grace, what walks hand in hand with this realization is a deeper understanding of why Jesus warned us that the path to true life is narrow. These blessings have not come without first experiencing the uncovering of some of the deepest fears and insecurities in my life, some of the darkest hours of the night, and some of the most difficult losses of the soul. I've truly learned what it means to depend on and cling to Him for EVERYTHING, and also just how scary that trust can be at times. In His unfathomable grace, He both gives and takes away. But in all, He is GOOD. And His love endures forever.
Perhaps I'm particularly nostalgic today because I am realizing more and more that my time here in Honduras is getting shorter and coming to a looming end. As some of you know, following several months of prayer, I have felt called to finally return to the States to be with my family at the end of June this year. While I look forward to the many exciting changes that await me there, I also begin to mourn the ending of this beautifully full chapter of His love story. I dread the good-byes and the unknowns, yet I know His plan is perfect. And so I choose to fully embrace these final 4 months of my adventure in Honduras, seeking to remain fully present in every moment and striving to give my all in every relationship His has given me for an eternal purpose. So as I step into these final stages of the most impacting "era" of my life, I ask for your prayers. Prayers for focus, strength, discernment, presence, opportunity, salvation, and answered petitions. Prayers for proper closure, divine moments, and unforgettable revelation.
As this stage of the love saga comes to a close, I pray with all of my heart that I can whisper back at Him, "I did it all for You. And every moment was worth it. Your Love gave me everything I needed, and the hand I held never let me go."
So if I disappear for a while, have no fear....I'm lost in the moment, carried away by His love song to me in Honduras.
It was the last week of June in 2008, and I was on my knocking knees in desperate fear. I was all alone, in a country not my own, surrounded by a language I did not understand and did not believe I would ever master. And yet God, in His loving-kindness, chose that very moment to soothe me with His love and remind me of the great plans He had for my time in Honduras; a length of stay unbeknownst to me at that time.
Well, we all know that God writes incredible love stories...stories of adventure, hope, heroic battle, victory, and romance. And yet, as characters in His great novels, we also know that He disciplines those He loves. And so has been my partnership with the Lord in this great "love story" of the past 4 years and 8 months. I've been beyond blessed to accomplish and experience amazing feats I never thought of or dreamed to be possible (i.e. learning Spanish, returning to grad. school, and returning to running competition). I've seen the beauty of His Creation in little corners of this ginormous world I never imagined I'd visit, from remote towns in Honduras to the breath-taking Mayan ruins of Tikal, Guatemala. I've learned and continue to take hold of the religion that is considered pure and faultless: truly loving orphans and widows in their distress. I've also learned that true love is more of a commitment than anything else. I've knocked things off the "bucket list" before I even knew they were there. I now always lose at the "I've never..." game with my students, because there's just not much I haven't done yet...WOW...and it is all by God's unbelievable grace. I serve a great, great God and stand in awe of how unworthy I am of the many gifts and blessings He loves to shower down on His children.
Yet these riches haven't come without great cost. While I now more intimately understand His love and grace, what walks hand in hand with this realization is a deeper understanding of why Jesus warned us that the path to true life is narrow. These blessings have not come without first experiencing the uncovering of some of the deepest fears and insecurities in my life, some of the darkest hours of the night, and some of the most difficult losses of the soul. I've truly learned what it means to depend on and cling to Him for EVERYTHING, and also just how scary that trust can be at times. In His unfathomable grace, He both gives and takes away. But in all, He is GOOD. And His love endures forever.
Perhaps I'm particularly nostalgic today because I am realizing more and more that my time here in Honduras is getting shorter and coming to a looming end. As some of you know, following several months of prayer, I have felt called to finally return to the States to be with my family at the end of June this year. While I look forward to the many exciting changes that await me there, I also begin to mourn the ending of this beautifully full chapter of His love story. I dread the good-byes and the unknowns, yet I know His plan is perfect. And so I choose to fully embrace these final 4 months of my adventure in Honduras, seeking to remain fully present in every moment and striving to give my all in every relationship His has given me for an eternal purpose. So as I step into these final stages of the most impacting "era" of my life, I ask for your prayers. Prayers for focus, strength, discernment, presence, opportunity, salvation, and answered petitions. Prayers for proper closure, divine moments, and unforgettable revelation.
As this stage of the love saga comes to a close, I pray with all of my heart that I can whisper back at Him, "I did it all for You. And every moment was worth it. Your Love gave me everything I needed, and the hand I held never let me go."
So if I disappear for a while, have no fear....I'm lost in the moment, carried away by His love song to me in Honduras.
